


I won't ever let you go

by orphan_account



Series: Femlock Bingo [1]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Femlock, First Kiss, Genderbending, Genderswap, John Loves Sherlock, John gets hurt, Love Confession, Mark is evil, Mary is Mark, Post-Episode: The Abominable Bride, Sherlock is soft, three garridebs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-20
Updated: 2016-03-20
Packaged: 2018-05-27 23:10:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6303835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John would do anything to protect Sherlock. She would even die for Sherlock.</p><p> </p><p>Femlock; Three Garridebs scenario.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I won't ever let you go

**Author's Note:**

> Since this is Genderbend Mary is Mark in this story

John’s heart had never beaten any faster or louder. Never. And god she was scared. So goddamn scared. Usually she could handle dangerous situations easily. She felt collected, ready but not this time.

Not when Sherlock was in danger.

Not when the love of her life was in danger. Again.

And John honestly didn’t care about her own safety. She only cared about Sherlocks.

And so she stood at a wall in a old, abandoned industrial house trying to figure out where Sherlock and Mark were. It was deadly silent and John couldn’t keep the thought away that she might be to late.

The night was cold and John could see tiny clouds coming out of her mouth each time she breathed out. From far away she could hear a dog barking and a car driving by. The wind was light and soft and barely noticeable. And John’s hands were cold. She should have taken gloves with her. It all had gone so fast. Late at night John had gotten a text from Sherlock where she asked if John could come towards a deserted factory. John, of course, had gotten dressed as fast as she could and wanted to inform Mark where she was going when John noticed that he wasn’t there anymore. And then it clicked. John had called Mycroft as fast as possible and had told him her suspicion. She then ran out of her house and towards the given address. It hadn’t taken her more than 15 minutes but she hadn’t heard anything back from Sherlock yet and to be honest it scared the shit out of her.

Please be safe. Please Sherlock.

And that's when she heard it. Someone was laughing not to far away from John. It was a deep laugh that made her uncomfortable in every possible way. First of all it sounded evil and a bit not good and second of all it was the laugh from Mark.

John moved towards the sound. The corridors were dark and there was shattered glass and debris everywhere on the ground. It was hard to navigate forward without making any noise but she was a soldier. And she desperately wanted to save Sherlock. She had failed all the other times. She couldn’t fail now.

She started to hear Sherlock’s beautiful voice and with shock John noticed that Sherlock truly sounded afraid. 

Fuck you Mark. Fuck you for making her sound like that. Sherlock should never sound afraid like that. Sherlock was strong and confident and it tore at John’s heart. 

John came to a stop by the door and pressed herself against the wall. She was able to see Mark standing at one end with a gun pointed at Sherlock. At Sherlock’s head to be exact. Sherlock stood defenseless at the other side. For everyone else she would probably look confident and fearless but John could see how tense she was. Mark on the other hand looked like he enjoyed himself immensely. He had a wicked smile on his face and looked at Sherlock with mischief.

‘Took you long enough. I always thought you were the smartest person on earth. Or at least that’s what Johanna always told me. Seems like you are actually quite stupid.’ John bristled. And in any other situation that didn’t involve guns and a life or death situation she would have snarled back at him that he couldn’t say that to Sherlock and that her name was John. 

‘You were so blinded. So stupid. The only thing you cared about was Johanna. You didn’t even considered anything else! You have to admit it was rather clever. Burning the heart out of you? Didn’t expect it to happen this way, did you?’

‘I don’t know what you mean,’ replied Sherlock with a quiet voice.

‘Bullshit. Everyone, really everyone, knows how you feel about her. To bad she doesn’t feel the same way about you.’ John’s heart stopped as soon as she heard those words. She didn’t want to think about the meaning. She didn’t want to think about the fact that Sherlock might-

‘It was all a plan. You fake your death, I mean seriously did you think we wouldn’t notice, you go after my web while I make Johanna fall in love with me. You come back after two years of hell and loneliness hoping that everything could go back to normal and you discover that she moved on. That she will marry and leave you. Sherlock you should have seen your face at the wedding reception. I have never seen anyone so heartbroken. It was to easy.’ Again that horrible laugh and John had to really hold herself together so she wouldn’t storm out there and shoot him in this exact second. 

Sherlock, I never knew. I’m sorry.

‘To bad. Don’t worry this time you won’t survive. I’ll be there for Johanna but I don’t think she will be too affected by your death.’ John heard the click of the safety bar being removed and before she even thought anything through she stormed into the room threw herself against Sherlock who stumbled to the floor and she shot in the general direction of Mark. 

She was still able to see Marks shocked face and how he crumbled to the floor with a hole in his chest before she noticed her own pain. Everything slowed down and she noticed blood pulsing out of her chest. She swayed slightly and slowly, oh so slowly, she fell to the ground. In the background she heard Sherlock shout her name. The floor was cold and hard. She felt warm. And she was in pain.  
There was a hand on her chest then something blue flashed in front of her and pressed down onto her chest. She thought she recognized Sherlock’s scarf.

‘Sherlock?’ she asked. A hand on her cheek and then a face appeared in front of her. Oh, that beautiful face. Those beautiful eyes now so full of panic, desperation and love. And John understood. She understood now.

‘John, it will be alright. It will be alright. I’m sorry, so sorry,’ Sherlock’s voice trembled and there were tears. Oh Sherlock please don’t cry. 

John slowly raised her arm and put her hand on Sherlock’s cheek which were wet. ‘Sherlock, I’m sorry. I should have never…’ a moan escaped her and then there was more pressure on her chest.

‘Shut up John. Just shut up. Someone will be here soon.’ John only shook her head.

‘I should have seen.’

‘No. Stop.’

‘I love you.’ Sherlock stilled and John smiled. It felt good to say it. After all these years and all the silent ‘I love you’s’ she never dared to say it, it felt good to say it now. And she meant it with all her heart. ‘I love you Sherlock.’

‘John…’ Sherlock’s voice was so quiet and soft. John wished she could hear it more often. She wished for lazy nights at Bakerstreet. She wished for christmases with just them under the tree and hot tea. She wished for sunny mornings where both of them could lie in bed together and cuddle. She wished for just the two of them.

‘John. Don’t leave me. I-” Sherlock’s voice broke and there was silence for a moment and John could see Sherlock fighting an internal battle till she finally said, ‘Me too. I love you to.’ 

John grabbed Sherlock’s hands. With shock she noticed that Sherlock’s hands were full of blood. Her blood. 

‘I don’t want to go.’

‘Then don’t!’ Sherlock replied and gripped John’s hands so hard that it began to hurt. 

John closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Probably her last one.

‘Forgive me, Sherlock.’

~

She wasn’t dead. She felt sheets under her. Pain in her chest. She heard the heart monitor. She smelled the typical hospital smell. 

So the only reasonable conclusion was that she was in fact alive.

‘John?’ That voice. That beautiful voice. John had thought that she would never hear it again. 

‘I’m alive,’ she whispered. John slowly opened her eyes. The light was dimmed and her eyes quickly adjusted. Fingertips carefully and lightly touched her hand as if they weren't’ sure if they were allowed to. John opened her palm and Sherlock took the invitation and laid her hand on John’s. It was perfect.

‘Do you need something?’ Sherlock asked quietly. 

‘Water, please.’ John felt Sherlock move from her side but her hand never left Johns. Then there was a glass at her mouth and cold water. It was the best thing she drank in her whole life. 

John wanted to sit up but she knew it would hurt so she stayed in the position in which she was and only turned her head towards Sherlock. Sherlock looked like shit. Her hair was all messy, she looked tired and John noticed that Sherlock probably had cried more than once. She also looked terrified and wouldn’t dare meet John’s eyes. 

‘I meant what I said.’ John whispered, ‘I love you.’ 

Sherlock stilled and then slowly turned her eyes towards John’s. John smiled and Sherlock visibly relaxed.

‘You did?’ She asked.

‘Yes.’ John answered. Sherlock then looked uncertain and John’s heart sank. Did she say something wrong? Did Sherlock actually not love her back and only said it to comfort her? Sherlock looked up towards John again and asked, ‘Can I kiss you?’

John nodded. Her heart started to beat faster and she started sweating. This is what she had wanted to do for years now. To kiss Sherlock. Sherlock bend down till their foreheads touched. John noticed that Sherlock was just as nervous as she was. And John giggled.

‘We’re idiots,’ she whispered.

Sherlock smiled and put her hand into John’s hair, ‘You are my idiot.’ And then their lips touched. It was soft and all so perfect. Sherlock’s hand in her hair, her lips on Johns. John cupped Sherlock’s cheek and they kissed like that for a while. They parted slowly and Sherlock’s head moved towards John’s neck. Just laying there.

‘I thought I lost you.’ John heard Sherlock say.

‘I won’t go anywhere ever again.’ John promised and touched Sherlock’s silky and soft curls. After years of miscommunication and pining, loss and grief she was finally, finally able to hold Sherlock. And she won’t ever let her go again.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading
> 
> My [Tumblr](http://johnlockandstars.tumblr.com)


End file.
